For whatever it's worth, the real Vanya clearly isn't enjoying the conversation, for all he's cooperating. The beats may be the same, but the framing in tone and body language is markedly different.

"I did think of that," quietly, of the illustration he'd just had of why quitting had been practical. As much as part of him wonders if he'd have been captured in the first place if he still had his abilities, most of him is grateful all four of the captives had been spared the additional stress of his involuntary withdrawal.

"Even so, I sympathize with the others. I think ... I'd resigned from the Order years before I gave up lyrium. I can't speak for everyone's reasons for continuing to use it, but for me — obviously the addiction was a factor. But I also think." He pauses, weighing his words. "Our training, and our experience. It creates a certain frame of mind. By design, I strongly suspect. It was hard for me not to feel that I would be useless to Riftwatch, or anyone else, without the abilities lyrium granted. Especially after so many years' dependence on it."

He's not sure he would have been able to articulate the insidiousness of that, even a year or two ago. But the more distance he has, the clearer that aspect has become to him.